You prepare a table before me, in the presence of my enemies Ps 23:5a

The feast laid before me is sure mind blowing, in awe of the pleasant dishes, I seat silent. Silent not at the dishes in themselves, but that the Chief Chef chose me to seat and eat of His delicacies. My surroundings are a stark contrast to the feast: anxiety, bitterness, unforgiveness, and deceit. The eyes staring at me, trying yet failing to dissect me are dark. Dark with loathe for me, they just cannot understand why in the midst of everything: no subsidy, bomb blast and shooting am unfazed.

It is so easy to accept their eyes as they appear…as I reach for my glass and drink deeply of Joy unspeakable, it is hard to restrain the smile dancing in my eyes and on my lips. Glancing at the eyes, I still am unable to get the words to explain my behaviour.

Giving into the salad of grace, mercy and favour, I chew softly knowing it’s not of me, not my works…He simply chose me in love. I look into the eyes, something seems to dart behind loathe and am wondering, do they realise that mine shines forth forgiveness, only because I accepted the appetiser of divine forgiveness, surely they must know, without it I could not forgive. The bread of life and the soup of the Spirit is not a dish I’d never tire of.

How do I explain that it is not of me, surely if they yet accept the appetiser being offered them, just like I did a while back…my unexplainable behaviour would be theirs too.

© Itse Tosan 23rd January 2012

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