Archives for posts with tag: marriage

The union (if I may use that word) of any two individuals is important.

Who you walk with is key. Who you run with is key. The outcome of your life and all that concerns you rests on this. How you choose your partners is key too.
Relatives we cannot choose generally but should we decided to work with them, live with them, we have chosen.

More than we might realise, God is interested with whom we partner: – in our businesses, in ministry, in relationships broadly and most definitely marriage.
For each partner, there would be a corresponding instruction and leading. Where to go, who to go the journey with, why you should go the journey together.

God is purposeful, in all of His ways, nothing has ever been done by God without purpose. The partners we pick or are picked by must be ones of purpose. Purpose that gladdens God’s heart, partners that are pleasing unto God, made just for the scenario.
When you think partners, think – suitable, comparative to, equally yoked, helpmeet, approved of God.

© 02 February, 2017


I recall a very heated discussion which took place a few years back. ‘What should be the basis of a man and woman coming together in marriage?’ was the topic. Everyone felt their opinion was best, majority of the guys were of the view that love is the sole basis and all others should never be considered. Some of the ladies held the view that money could be, so long as both the man and woman were in the know that money was the binding force. I was thoroughly amused by the shock on the guys’ faces.

A few days back, I replied to a debate on which the issue of what was the secret to a lasting marriage was. The debate was based upon the following question and answer:
Q: What is the secret to your lasting marriage?
A: white couple: each person spend your money.
Black couple: man- spend all your money on your wife, and let her spend on her money on herself.
We were then to argue for or against both responses, which was right. And I thought to myself, both are right, because it has worked for both of them.

Today in church a question was raised after a scenario had been painted: Man—head of home, Woman—helpmeet, Food related matters – majorly woman’s role, children – both are responsible equally. Woman is a banker, closes 9:30/10:00pm Monday to Fridays, Man Closes 4:00/5:00pm. Who handles the children and food related matters. Everyone had an opinion and thought it prime.
A lady said: woman quits her job,
Men said: no, not with today economy, should find another job.
What if she can’t get another easily or at all the women replied.
Someone said: she cooks weekend and freezes, all man needs do is warm and eat during the week.
A lady said: that the food will be chaff!
Finally a lady says that is the scenario playing out in her home and six years down the road they are coping with it.

Amused, time and time again by all the right answers, truly none has been wrong but neither was one superior to the other. Partnerships are based on agreements by the partners. What works for A, does not bind B. In the area of marriage partnerships, make sure the basis, the reason behind its establishment is met: companionship, raising Godly children. How you go about achieving that is between the man, the woman and God. Whatever works for you go for it.

Then the Lord God said, “it is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him. Genesis 2:18

Can two walk together unless they be agreed? Amos 3:3

Didn’t the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are His. And what does He want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart, remain loyal to the wife of your youth. Malachi 2:15

Unpublished work of Itsetosan 3rd July 2011